Cat Puke

Okay so I've got a problem and its making me TWITCHY. And I think I'm a bad person for even thinking this so you can go ahead and tell me I'm a horrible person for typing it: But as much as I love my kitty cats and think that they're wonderful I'm almost ready to get rid of them b/c I can't stand having them puke EVERY WHERE all the damn time.

I need some help.

Maybe its just b/c I've never had a long haired cat before (I have one short hair, one medium hair and one long hair cats) or I've never had indoors only cats before but I am NOT exaggerating when I say that at least ONE of them pukes EVERY DAMN DAY.

They're on Science Diet Indoor Lite food. We've tried putting them on the Sensitive Stomach diet (expensive and didn't work). We've tried the Hairball formula (also expensive, didn't work and made the short haired cats acne on his chin flair up).

I've tried feeding them Vasaline (only the short hair will take it - and he likes it like crack but he still pukes).

The long haired cat REFUSES to be brushed (she WILL bite you) and I can't afford to have her shaved (think 100 bucks) and the other two are not fans of the brush either and either way I don't have time to sit and spend an hour twice a week grooming these stupid cats.

So please ANYBODY if you have an idea, solution, magic wand to make it all better, PLEASE I beg you tell me what to do.

Maybe I should try a completely different brand?? I'm just SOOO tired of cleaning the floor and washing my rugs and waking up in the morning and stepping in a puddle of cat puke on my way to the bathroom. Its just REALLY not okay.

Help. Please.