Ode to Spray On Sunblock

Me + Spray On Sunblock = FAIL

So yesterday I tried this spray on sunblock thing before the kid and I went swimming. And apparently I got it right with the kid b/c he is fine (mercifully) but I instead got this narly, patchy, time delayed sun burn. It sucks.

I got home from the pool at like 11:30-ish and in the mirror I was just barely light pink. "Close call" was my thought. *head desk*

Then its like 7pm and we're watching tv and I start to notice that I hurt and my tshirt feels unreasonably hot but only in certain areas (its summer in Phoenix so the fact it didn't feel that way ALL OVER was my clue something was up). So I wander into the bathroom and take a look in the mirror. Right shoulder is light pink in places but not too bad. Then I see the left shoulder. HOLY CRAP that is RED.

*Ugh*

And so right now I'm extremely grateful that my kid is just barely 3 years old and not to the point of freaking out over nudity b/c I have so been running around the house topless b/c clothes HURT. But my little party is about to end b/c my friend is going to drop by here in another hour and I'm going to have to put a shirt on which is going to STINK and she's just going to have to deal w/ the fact that my house is a mess and I'm not wearing a bra b/c right now my idea of a good time is holding as still as possible while sitting on the sofa and if I put bra straps on this monster there will be screaming which would probably impair our ability to have a conversation. Just sayin.

And I NEVER get sunburns, at least not in the last few years, had a couple of accidental burns when I first moved to Phoenix and had to readjust to life in the sun, but I digress. Point is I try my hardest NOT to get sunburns b/c my mother is a skin cancer survivor and I don't want that crap and I'm fricking glow in the dark white and I don't tan. I just get BRIGHT red, peel and go back to white. It sucks.

If anything I just get more freckles and dangit if freckles don't make me nervous now. I keep staring at them and trying to judge if they've changed and going over the ABC's of skin cancer (Asymmetry, Border, Color, Diameter) to see if I need to run screaming to a doc for a biopsy or not.

*screaming cussing many bad words more cussing*